About Anna Metcalf

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So far Anna Metcalf has created 278 blog entries.

The Aggravating Singaporean Tissue Issue

Sure, sure . . . Singapore is that weird place where they hang tourists at the airport on Friday afternoons for any kind of drug possession, but are completely OK with a red light district. Most people know about that already. But I want to discuss something which you may not be aware of . . . something of utmost importance for the Western man with ample facial hair – The great Singaporean Tissue […]

Negotiating A Rent Controlled Buyout

You or someone you know is going through the exquisite pain of negotiating a rent-controlled buyout? I’ve been through it. Here are a few suggestions.

But first . . . a few disclaimers.

I am not a lawyer. I’m just a super detail-oriented chick whose been through this myself. Also – I don’t know any specifics about your town. All I know is how it all went […]

Giving Up The Bungalow

On June 1st of this year, after fourteen amazing years, I gave up my precious Venice bungalow. One of the only places ever in my life that has felt truly like home. It was the place where I re-invented myself after divorcing my first husband and following my dream to move from Tennessee to Los Angeles. It was my little piece of heaven. It was my […]

Labskaused In Hamburg


Today I decided to try what I found described on the internet (Oh, the interwebs!) as a “Hamburg specialty not to be missed, but that was sort of . . . well . . . strange.” I’m IN!

And I was doing a pretty good job of choking it down until Matt said, “It’s kinda like getting hot-karled except nastier because it involves that disgusting McDonald’s pink […]

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Hopping Back On The Merry Go Round


It’s been a long time, friends. I’m hopping back on this merry go round of blogging. Here’s what’s going on, short version:

Matt and I gave up our Venice bungalow on June first of this year. We’ve been on the road ever since. We put our stuff in storage. Frank the cat is on vacation in Alabama. We have no jobs right now. I am forever […]

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Blood -N- Guts At Haw Par Villa



My favorite cheesy attraction in Singapore by far is Haw Par Villa (pronounced Whore Paw Villa). As an Ang Mo, of course I love it for the pronunciation of the name alone, but the putt putt golf-like plaster sculptures of bloody Chinese mythology and fables are, like, the best thing ever.

The guy who invented Tiger Balm built this park a couple […]

The Most Caucasian People In Singapore

My husband and I are *the* most Caucasian People in Singapore right now, I guarantee it.

We have traveled to this equatorial city-state to be a part of a very traditional Chinese wedding. (Well, except that the groom is American.) One of Matt’s best friends, Blair, is getting married and so we decided to bring the most American thing we could think of – fortune cookies. We marched right […]

99 Problems But A Fucking Brain Squirrel Ain’t One (Anymore!)

I can’t be the only one. Ever get a Brain Squirrel?

Let’s be clear – I’m not talking about squirrel brains, you guys, that’s totally gross. And apparently, squirrel brains are an overlooked delicacy, but I don’t buy it. It can give you Mad Cow Disease. Mad Fucking Cow Disease, ok? Besides, they’re totally gross. I’m an open-minded individual, but I have to draw the line at squirrel brains. Just writing about it makes me […]

The Day I Almost Ran Over A Banker In My Hooptie-Mobile

These days, everyone hates bankers, but I decided one day to take it a step further.

But in my defense, he kinda had it coming. I don’t even know his name, but I knew him all right; I knew him on sight. I knew him from the day I went in to analyze the perks of getting a new kind of account at Chase (because I’m a money dork).  This guy, pasty and creepy and with […]

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My neighbor, Lou Diamond Phillips

Or as I refer to him – to his face – LDP. (He’s my buddy, I can get by with that.)

It all started some time last year. I was at a storytelling show in my neighborhood and got invited to sit at a table with a bunch of people I didn’t know. I said hello to my new friends and the natural course of conversation […]